It was a hot and sticky Wednesday afternoon in Grand Rapids, Michigan.  The day started out refreshingly cool until summer came knocking again.  I thought Labor Day magically signaled the end of long, hot days.  By mid-afternoon I felt worn down from the rising temperatures and the normal rush of my day.   

Despite my feelings, I told my son I would bake cupcakes for him to bring to school for his birthday and I needed to buy a few supplies.  I put the kids in the van and drove to the store.  There is a Papa Murphy’s located a few doors down from the grocery store.  As soon as I saw the sign, it triggered a Pavlovian response in me.  Suddenly, I wanted needed a cheap, salty pizza and an excuse to not make dinner. 

I called my husband as I pulled into the parking lot of the grocery store.
Sounding tired I said, “Hey hon.  It’s me.  I am not feeling well.  It is so hot and I have to bake cupcakes for Jude to bring to school.  I don’t feel like making dinner.  I want to order a pizza from Papa Murphy’s.”
I thought my husband would remind me of my commitment to no take-out food.  Instead he replied, “Sounds good.”
“But I feel bad because of my commitment to not ordering any take-out food.  Remember?  It is one of my challenges for my blog,” I said, feeling a bit disappointed that he seemed to have forgetten.
Acting slightly surprised, my husband responded, “Oh, yeah.  That’s right.” 
Clearly he was not going to talk me out of ordering a pizza. 
I sighed and said, “Well, I am feeling sick, it is hot and I still need to bake some cupcakes.  I guess those are good enough reasons to break my commitment and order some pizza just this once.”
“Uh-huh,” replied my husband sympathetically.
Trying to ignore my self-doubt, I said, “Okay.  That settles it.  I am going to order a pizza.”

A few minutes later, I found myself parked in front of Papa Murphy’s having another conversation.  Except this conversation was in my head as my “tired” voice and my “committed” voice wrestled with my decision to buy a take-out pizza. 
I heard the tired voice in my head say, “I really don’t feel good.  Can’t I order a pizza just this once?  It is not that big of a deal.”
To which my committed voice replied, “Of course you can, but what about your no take-out food commitment?”
Feeling frustrated, my tired voice answered, “But it is my project and I can give myself a break if I want to!”
To which my committed voice responded, “You are right.  You can give yourself a break.  You are only human after all.  But what about those heirloom tomatoes and melons you just bought from the Farmer’s Market?  And those last few cucumbers from your Grandpa’s garden?  They will go bad if you do not use them.”
My shoulders slumped in defeat as my son hollered from the backseat, “Mom, why are we parked here?  Are we gonna go home and bake my cupcakes?”
I replied, “Yes.  Just a minute.  I am trying to make an important decision.”
I returned to the conversation in my head and my committed voice won as I said to myself, “This is exactly why I decided to do a blog.  I wanted accountability.  I am going to go home and make dinner.”

I drove home and mustered up the energy to make homemade salsa with heirloom tomatoes, peppers, carrots and jalapenos I had recently purchased from the Farmer’s Market.  Along with salsa, we ate a sweet cantaloupe and fresh cucumbers from my Grandpa’s garden.  Dinner tasted as delicious as it sounds.  But to be honest, I was still craving that cheap, salty take-out pizza.  Were it not for my commitment to trying to live a more sustainable life and the accountability of writing my blog, my tired voice would have won and I would have found myself saying, “Forget it!  Who cares about one, little pizza?!  It doesn’t really matter in the larger scheme of things!”  And I would have ordered that pizza.

The thoughts expressed through my conversation with my husband and the conversation in my head have been typical of the moments where I really want to buy some convenience food.  Although I did not order a take-out pizza on Wednesday, I have given into my tired, hungry voice a couple of times since taking on my Grandma Challenge of not eating out or ordering in.  Despite a few failures, I am going to persist with this challenge because for one year I want it to matter whether or not I order a take-out pizza.  I want to understand that even though I may want take-out pizza, I do not need take-out pizza.  I usually have plenty of food waiting for me at home.

Experts say it takes thirty days to develop a new habit.  I think it is going to take a year or more of repeatedly walking away from my urge to order take-out pizza and other convenience food items before I fully embrace the plenty that already exists in my own life.

I love sushi.  I tried it for the first time with my husband a little over a year ago.  He thought it would be fun to try something new on my birthday.  I was very skeptical but took one bite and fell head over heals in love - with the sushi that is.  It was a thrill!  I do not eat sushi all the time but I eat it enough that it no longer feels special.  It has gone the way of most things in my life which is to say it has become a fairly ordinary activity.

As you may recall from my post, What Would Grandma Do For Fun, I manage to go to a restaurant or order take out at least once a week.  That feels like a lot when I see it in print.  I do not even want to think about how many times my husband or I grab a coffee to go in a given week but I am afraid I am going to have to.   

According to David Bach, author of Go Green, Live Rich, ”Americans spend over $134 billion a year on fast food.”  He goes on to say that packaging from take out food results in 1.8 million tons of trash in the U.S. alone every year.  And then there is all of that lovely coffee I enjoy drinking from various coffee houses around town.  Bach writes, “Every year, Americans drink more than 100 billion cups of coffee.  Of these, 14.4 billion are served in disposable paper cups, enough to wrap the Earth 55 times if placed end to end!  Plus, those paper cups contain a plastic lining made from a petrochemical that would produce enough energy to heat 8,300 homes for a year.”  I have a plastic trash bag full of take out coffee cups sitting in my van right now.  I used to think I could recycle them but probably not because of that “petrochemical” coating.

My friend Lavonne shared the following story about her mom in a comment to What Would Grandma Do For Fun?  “My mom would look forward to going to the county fair once a year because her parents would buy the kids a corn dog.  She looked forward to this corn dog all year because it was the only time her family ‘went out’ to eat.”  I bet Lavonne’s mom ate that corn dog very slowly, savoring each and every piece, not letting a single crumb fall to the floor.  That was one sacred corn dog!

Each of my grandparents confirmed that going out to eat was a special treat that really only occurred once they were young adults and were starting families of their own.  They never recall going out to eat when they were children.  I am sure this was true of most people who lived through the Great Depression.  And they never, ever would have dreamed of ordering a four dollar latte.  Come to think of it, I never would have thought of ordering a four dollar latte just 10 years ago.  I am sure the statistics on take out containers and disposable coffee cups would have looked very different in the 1930’s and 40’s!

I want to use my year of living like Grandma to help me make the act of eating sushi feel sacred - just like when Lavonne’s mom ate that corn dog so many years ago.

When something is sacred, it is special.  It is given a place of honor and deemed worthy of respect.  I will never be able to capture that special thrill I felt when I ate sushi for the first time but it can feel more special, more sacred if I choose to eat it less frequently.  And if I eat out less, order in less and give up my expensive lattes, not only will sushi (and pizza and coffee) feel special again, I will also be taking a few big steps toward living more sustainably and simply.

So here is my next Grandma Challenge.  For the remainder of my year of living like Grandma (which officially ends on June 23, 2009), I am not going to eat out or order in unless there is a truly special reason.  I will make an exception on the rare occasion that my husband’s parents offer to take me and my family out to eat.  I also will not prohibit my kids from eating out when they spend time with friends or family.

I am also going to give up coffee purchased in to go cups.  From now on, I will brew my coffee at home and tote it with me in my own stainless steel mug.  If by chance I need to meet up with someone at a restaurant, I will allow myself to buy coffee but only if I can get it in a ceramic mug or use my travel mug.  I will buy a plain cup of coffee, not a fancy latte.

Do you want to join me for this Grandma Challenge? Why or why not?  You do not have to give up all three things - eating out, ordering in and coffee to go.  You can pick one or two.  You can also decide to abstain for a shorter period of time versus a whole year.  Any duration of abstaining from something can help you step back and gain a different perspective.  I read a great little book last year called, Give It Up: My Year of Learning to Live Better With Less by Mary Carlomagno.  The author picked one thing to give up each month for one year.  It is a great way to experiment with living more sustainably and simply!

The little picture above is of some items I bought today for myself and my kids from a wonderful local bakery.  We usually do this at least one to two times a month (at my suggestion because I need want coffee).  It may not seem like a lot of waste but when you consider a bunch of people doing it one to two times a month it quickly adds up to those statistics I quoted earlier!